What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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