it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
