When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
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dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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