can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Randomize
