What a fucking waste of an outfit
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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