ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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