She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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