my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
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