i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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