Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
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my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
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He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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