North Korea, Best Korea!
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
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