Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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