Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
