Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Randomize
