And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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