so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Randomize
