found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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