It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
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I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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