Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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