I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Randomize