Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
whose ass print is on the piano?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
