So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
