talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
