Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
