he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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