Do you still have your period?
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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