i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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