I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Also, beer. Big fan.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
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