hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
everyone is single if you try hard enough
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I will pee on everything he values.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
