You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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