Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize