Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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