If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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