My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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