just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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