i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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