i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
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I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
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Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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