That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
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im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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