He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
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I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
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The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
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