This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
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Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
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Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
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