Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
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