i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
