i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
