he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
