Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
