why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
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He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
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I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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