I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
