He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I am available for nakedness
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Randomize
