She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldnâ€™t Be More Proud
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.