giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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